My Experience with Baby Led Weaning

When it came for the time to introduce Olivia to solids I was a little overwhelmed. At 5 months we had just gotten her reflux under control so she was just beginning to nurse well and I felt confident she was getting good nutrition and growing every day.  Adding solids into the mix just confused me. I didn’t want to do anything to hinder the wonderful nursing relationship I had FINALLY started having, but I also did not want to delay this next step because I knew she was ready to eat. I mean seriously, the girl stared down my morning banana like it was nobody’s business.

 

All along I had thought that Baby Led Weaning (BLW), sounded like a great idea. For those of you that don’t know, BLW is basically skipping puree and letting baby feed themselves. (Read more here.) It seemed so intuitive and so progressive. I read a lot of blogs about it and most of the moms seemed to be really happy they chose that route. After some more research I was pretty convinced we would do it too.

At Olivia’s 6 month check up we discussed solids with her pediatrician. She recommended the traditional route (rice cereal, rice cereal, rice cereal) and basically laughed when I told her about BLW. After her response I felt conflicted. We decided to try spoon feeding first.

Olivia seemed okay with the cereal but after a few times she started fighting me for the spoon. I felt like I had to "trick" her by distracting her so I could get the food in her mouth. It felt so wrong. I hated it. Meal after meal I tried to feed her and avoid her hands grabbing and pushing away the spoon. In the back of my mind I couldn’t help but think that I should just let her feed herself.

 

Soon after I steamed up some carrots and offered her some other BLW first foods. Avocado slices, softened apple, pear, ripe nectarines and plums, etc. She really seemed to enjoy it and I loved watching her taste new things. Yet, after a few licks and squishes, she began biting off chunks. And then it was BIG chunks. Soon after followed some major gagging and it was horrifying. I had nightmares about choking and mealtimes became more stressful for me.

Joe and I took an infant CPR class but I still worried. I stuck to the foods I felt were safe and I found comfort in the fact that her gag reflex worked so well. Soon enough she had learned to chew and was managing foods really well. At around 8 months she had a great pincer grasp so I started offering small pieces of food instead of large chunks. And that’s where we are now. Basically at this point she is eating like many other 9 month olds who are onto finger foods I think.

I must say that I never really fully embraced BLW and their suggestions to feed baby whatever you are eating because it didn’t always seem acceptable to me to give her what we were having. Not that it wasn’t healthy but often our meals included foods that had foods that were not soft enough, not organic, included something she had not yet, or contained too much salt. I’m just not laid back enough to go full steam ahead so in the end I still cooked her separate foods. We also followed the spacing rule (about 1-2 days in between new foods). I’m thankful we did this because we believe Olivia may have an egg intolerance.

 

Because of this, BLW is often more work for me than purees sometimes. I can’t just grab some pre-frozen homemade puree or the occasional jarred puree. Sometimes she will eat a pouch on the go, but she just doesn’t seem to like them all that much.

So basically what I’m saying is that my experience with BLW wasn’t exactly what I thought it would be. But mostly it’s because the BLW method is probably best for more relaxed parents. I think if I had stuck to feeding her purees and then just introduced finger foods a little bit after that we would be in the same place.  And maybe there would have been less panicking for me in the beginning. I don’t think I would go this route for a second child. But who knows, maybe I’ll be an old pro by then.

 

Moms- did you do BLW or traditional purees? How do you feel about the route you chose?

At what age did your baby eat mostly finger foods?

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Leaving Survival Mode

I was cruising the baby center forums the other day and came across a "What Do you Do All Day?" post from another mom. After reading through many of the responses about what these women (with more than one child) were accomplishing throughout the day I decided to give my day a long hard look.

 

Was I doing enough? Am I an adequate stay at home mom? Am I getting out of the house often enough?

 

I figured that at this point I could probably be taking on a little more and not letting fear of a mid project wake up or a mid errand meltdown get me down. I realized that it’s time for me to get out of survival mode and really start living again. I also wanted to step up my game in taking care of my home and cooking more exciting meals. I don’t need to make the same 5 things over and over again just because they can be made quickly.

Vietnamese Grilled Pork Noodle Bowl (not the best recipe, but I will work on it and get back to you)

Part of the reason that things have bit a little hard is the fact that Olivia has silent reflux which has made feeding her very difficult. This has been very emotionally exhausting and really upsetting for both of us. She is now on medicine much to my dismay, but it is working and she is eating better. She is still a nightmare to feed in public, but that’s just life with a distractible 5 month old I guess.

 

I think I was in survival mode a bit too long, but I guess there really aren’t any technicalities on that. I have a great and happy baby but I often let nerves get the best of me. I am glad that I have been able to acknowledge my state of mind and move away from it. I realized that if I don’t start enjoying these moments that they will soon be gone. Fear will always be here. These days with my first baby girl are fleeting.

 

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Facing my Fears

Motherhood is many things, but one of the most valuable things it has been teaching me lately is to face my fears head on.

 

I’m a nervous nelly by nature, so it wasn’t surprising to me that I fall into the category of "moms that worry about everything". Although I’d love to be a completely chill and relaxed mom, it’s just not me.

 

Each day I pretty much have to overcome my worries though- because life is moving ahead and I need to move and adapt with it. Some of my recent worries have involved traveling with the baby.

Since our family is all out of town, I knew we’d be on the road a lot with Olivia. Seems fine in theory but once it was time to actually do it, I worried about whether or not she’d be comfortable in the car, would she poop the minute we got on the highway? If we leave in between feedings will she be screaming to eat when we are stuck in traffic? What if we are on a bridge and she’s hungry? How will she be when in a new place? Will she sleep? Will she nap well? (and so on and so forth).

 

But we’re not going to stay home all of the time- it’s so important that Olivia knows her grandparents and extended family. Joe and I made a choice to be together and as a result away from family, so this is the life we will live. We need to embrace it. And we have.

 

Visiting my Dad and stepmom in NJ

Visiting my mom,sister and nephew in CT

Visiting Joe’s family in Pittsburgh

Then there are the everyday fears. These may seem ridiculous to you, but they are real to me!

 

I worry sometimes that I will dress Olivia wrong and then she will be too hot or too cold. I did this the other day when it looked grey and cloudy and cold but was really humid. She ended up being very hot and I had to strip her down to her onesie. But the next day the weather changed again, and we suited up and headed out.  This time I remembered to step outside first.

 

Both times I ventured to the new Wegman’s in town, Olivia has been in rare form. The first time we made it in, but she was very cranky and upset the whole time. Then earlier this week we went back and she was so hysterical that I had to put my groceries back and leave. For whatever reason, it wasn’t working. I realized later that I was going to the store during her nap time. It was over stimulating and she was getting upset. This time, I fed her, she napped and we went out when she was rested. Additionally, I wore her this time (another fear that I faced because I never put her in a carrier outside the house before).

 

I haven’t had much luck with babywearing although I really want it to work for us. I can’t get the Ergo quite right (I think it will be easier when she can spread her legs across my body instead of froggy), and she hated the sling, mei tai, and moby. I have a Bjorn Air, that was my sisters but I wasn’t sure about using it because there are articles about it affecting baby hips. However, Olivia seemed to like the Bjorn and it is easy to use. I see a ton of people using them and figured that 30 minutes once a week is not going to do anything to hurt her. So yesterday we went for it.

 

And she loved it. And we got the shopping done.

 

Being a mom is so rewarding for so many reasons and I love it. But one of the more unexpected upsides is seeing what I am capable of. From labor to the initial pain of breastfeeding, to the every day ups and downs I am getting stronger each day. And it feels really, really, good.

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Schedule (sort-of)

When our family left and Joe went back to work and I was on my own with Olivia I was pretty nervous about how our day would be. To be completely honest, some of the first days were really tough (and Olivia is a really good baby).

 

The days were tough because I had too many expectations about what our day would look like. You just can’t do that with a newborn (in my opinion). You have to let them lead the way and try and be as flexible as you can. In that first week I cried around 4pm everyday. It would start to get dark, Olivia would start to get fussy, and I would be getting very tired. I think my nervous energy just made things worse.

 

I would Google constantly trying to find some kind of schedule to make things easier for both Olivia and myself. If you’re reading this post right now, you may have searched for the same thing. Although no one else’s schedule is necessarily right for your baby, I think it’s helpful as a new mom to see what other people are doing. So here is our current schedule which reflects most days, but some days we have no schedule at all. I’ve included the fussy day routine and the sleepy day routine because Olivia’s mood really does effect what our day looks like.

 

8 ish: Olivia wakes up, she sleeps in a co-sleeper in our room. (We use the Arms Reach bassinet)

I let her stretch and wake up a bit and then feed her in my bed. On fussy days I sometimes need to feed her in the nursery because she moves around a lot while eating and we can’t get in sync as well as we do in the glider.

 

8:30 or so: Diaper change and dress for the day. I put Olivia in her crib and she moves her arms and legs and plays. She looks at her mobile, I go put in my contact lenses, use the bathroom, and sometimes go grab a cup of coffee to drink while playing with her. (*tip, always use the auto setting on your coffee maker the night before so its ready when you get up) At the end of her play session we do tummy time for a minute or two (or 30 seconds). If she’s fussy this playtime is shorter, but usually she is in a good mood at this time. I never push it, and if she gets upset, I take her out right away.

9am: Come downstairs, walk around, often another diaper change. Try to put Olivia in the swing for a nap. On fussy days she isn’t having any part of the swing and usually wails when I put her in it and makes me feel guilty for trying. So instead I walk her around more, go into the bathroom with the loud fan that she likes, swaddle her, give her a pacifier and attempt to lay her in her bassinet downstairs for a nap. Usually she will go down if she is calm, but may stir and wake up a bunch of times. Often she will bust out of my swaddle and lose the pacifier, so I just stay calm (try), reswaddle her and give her back the pacifier.

9:45: Pump.If she is fussy, I may skip this in order to eat because who knows how long she will nap.

10am (or so): Clean pump if I did that, and then eat breakfast. Most days I make egg whites on a bagel thin with turkey and spinach. A banana on the side. Fussy days I usually eat oatmeal because it’s faster. I load it with banana, walnuts, raisins and some flax seed. Calorie dense is good because mealtimes may be infrequent. I pour some cold almond milk on top to lower the temp so I can eat it quickly. Then I run around and try to get things done- laundry, dinner prep, prep my lunch and snacks for the rest of the day so they are easily available, etc. 

11:30 Depending on nap time…feed Olivia again, diaper change, lay her down to play on her playmat or bring her upstairs and put her in the bouncy seat while I shower and do things upstairs. Some days she hates the bouncy seat (most days), so time is limited. Yesterday as soon as I got all wet in the shower she spit out her pacifier and started wailing. I got a bit flustered thinking about how to run out of the shower soaking wet and pick her up to soothe her without clothing. Fortunately by the time I got out she was somewhat calm and I was able to hurry up and put a robe on. It was kind of funny actually.

 

From here it’s kind of hard to remember what we do. She will eat again, nap again, and there will be a bunch more diaper changes. Usually the order is- eat, diaper change, play a little (or something like that), she gets sleepy, I try and soothe her and put her back down.

 

Anywhere from 2-4pm : We venture out on a walk. Even on non-fussy days she cries when I put her in the carseat. I run downstairs to bring the diaper bag down, and then the carseat, and load her into the car. I can’t walk safely with her right out the door since we live on a busy road, so we drive to the park and walk for about a half hour.

 

3pm (or so): Another feeding (often a fussy one), usually followed by a nap on my chest. I often take this time to close my eyes as well.

 

4/5pm: Diaper change, playtime, etc. Sometimes there is another feeding because she spaces them closer together as the day goes on. If she eats and naps for a little, I’ll use this time to prepare dinner or clean up a little bit before Joe gets home.

5:45/6pm: Joe comes home, I hand him Olivia and get dinner ready, or I will go out and do something (quick trip to the gym, grocery store, etc). Sometimes she will hang out in the swing and we eat together, other times we eat in shifts. After dinner Joe usually holds Olivia and she rests but doesn’t sleep really.  I’ll get the bath ready if she is taking one (every other night usually)

 

6:30- 8:30-: More resting, another feeding, bathtime, PJ’s and then she goes upstairs into the nursery. Joe will give her a bottle and I will pump, or I will feed her. Either way, her last pre-bed feeding is always the same. In the nursery, lights down low, she eats, gets swaddled and then goes down in her co-sleeper. We try and do the same thing every night so she knows it’s bedtime. So far it’s working. When we put her down, usually she is awake but quiet and eventually falls asleep. One of us lays in there while the other gets a snack downstairs and then we switch.

 

9:30/9:45-I’m in bed and sleeping.

 

1am (or so): First night feeding, I take Olivia into the nursery. Feed one side, diaper change, feed other side

 

4 or 5am (or so): Second night feeding.

 

7:30/8am: Up for the day/repeat!

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Patience

For some time now I’ve been a big believer in positive affirmations. My favorite source of information on how to get started using positive affirmations is Louise Hay. Her book(accompanied by a wonderful CD), I Can DO It!  has changed my life. Whenever things in my life are weighing on me, my favorite way to combat anxiety and negativity are by creating affirmations that push my thoughts in a better direction. I can honestly say that when I’ve used them religiously, I’ve seen my reality change for the better.

A few years ago I lived in an apartment with two roommates. I got along with one of them, but the other drove me nuts. A good example of how she drove me nuts would be when she gave her boyfriend (of less than a month), a key to our apartment without asking permission. I found this out when I came home to him hanging out on my couch with her no where to be found.

 

I created an affirmation that was, "My living situation is perfect, my roommates are kind and respectful". I said it ALL the time. Within a month, my one roommate (that I liked) decided that she was buying a house with her boyfriend. Therefore, her boyfriend’s nice (and reasonably priced) apartment became available. I moved in there shortly after by myself and LOVED it.

 

Lately I found that I was feeling overwhelmed with my new situation and realized that so much of what was causing me anxiety had to do with my lack of patience.

• I want to be able to read Olivia’s cues and know what to do
• I want to have breastfeeding figured out and have the pain stop
• I want to be able to get out of the house
• I want to be able to be more productive during the day
• I want to like the way I look
• I want to fit into more of my clothes
• I want to feel like my old self

Once I looked at everything I wanted to JUST HAPPEN right away it was easy for me to formulate a new affirmation- "I am patient with my baby and myself".

 

I say it over and over and over and it’s starting to be true for me. Olivia and I are really getting to know each other. I let her lead the way and I follow her flow and don’t get impatient if I can’t figure something out right away. When I stay calm and remain patient, I’ve been more effective at soothing her and staying cool. If I just step away often it is more clear what she is asking for. And if the day doesn’t unfold how I want, I’m focusing on being patient and taking it one moment at a time.

 

Lately my goals are flexible and often include one main event (a walk, a shower, preparing dinner, a blog post) and go from there. If I get one thing done, GREAT! If I get more done, that’s awesome too. But the more patient I have become, the more things seem to work out.

I saw a lactation consultant on Saturday and breastfeeding has since gotten better. She showed me some simple tips and also helped confirm that I was doing a good job.

I joined a gym and even though I’m not yet cleared for exercise I did a very light workout last night for 20 minutes and it felt great. So far today I’ve eaten healthy and I’m making dinner in the crockpot.

 

Patience is everything for me. And it helps me to remember to just pause and enjoy life. I’m sure in a few months I will long for the days when all I expected of myself was a shower..and my only responsibility was making sure my baby was safe and fed and happy.

 

I urge you to check out Louise Hay’s books and see if positive affirmations can help you. They aren’t a miracle cure, and you really need to be diligent about it, but I promise you they work.

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Blah Blah Huh?

That’s what it kind of sounds like in my brain right now. Serious baby brain going on.

I guess that’s what happens when you spend your entire day with an infant. And I’m really not making this up. I got on the phone with my mom yesterday and for the first 10 minutes I was struggling to come up with complete sentences.

 

When Joe comes home from work at night I feel like I attack him with

1.) Please take the baby and 2.) Please talk to me

 

With this in mind I knew it was time to get myself some social interaction. Preferably with other moms who can understand where I"m coming from and maybe offer some tips on new mom stuff like:

1. Passing off sweatpants as real pants

2. How to reassure your husband that you’ll one day look presentable again

3. Help with mom guilt for things like – putting my baby in the swing so I can pump and shovel in breakfast

 

Unfortunately at Olivia’s one month checkup yesterday the pediatrician said that she can’t accompany me to places like new mom groups yet because she is too little. Other kids and just other people in general put her at risk to get sick (it is still flu season). She also put the kibosh on trips to the grocery store, and pretty much anywhere that isn’t a solo walk in the park.

 

So…

 

I’m a little upset, and I feel a little isolated on planet newborn. But I’ve decided to do a few things that I hope will help. (excuse me while I make another numbered list, this is the easiest way for me to write these days with mushbrain)

 

1. Focus on the positive – I’m learning how to be a mom, I will have this time to really bond with my baby, my baby is healthy (11 pounds!) and she sleeps incredibly well (4 hour stretches at night)!

 

2. Get out of the house even if it is a solo mission – Today I’m joining a small gym near my house. It’s not a deluxe place by any means, but it’s close by and I can get there for a quick workout when Joe comes home a few nights a week. I’m not cleared for exercise yet, but I’m going to walk on the treadmill and stretch. I just need the endorphins.

 

3. Make plans for weekends- I need to get out and see some friends

 

4. Remind myself that happy mom= happy baby.

 

 
ANY TIPS FOR ME on getting through this phase?

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Things other people may not tell you…

About being a new mom.

 

1. You’re going to be petrified. Of hurting your baby, of not knowing what to do when she cries, of not being a good mom, or making the right choices. You’ll google everything and find answers on both sides of every argument. (On demand? Schedule? Bath every night? Bath 2 times a week? Am I playing with her enough? ) You’ll also compare yourself to other moms, and to the mom you THOUGHT you would be.

 

2. Breastfeeding is hard. And painful, and everyone will see your boobs. And talk about your boobs. And your life will pretty much revolve around your boobs. Getting breastfeeding figured out is hard, and scary, and I’m 3 weeks in and I’m still figuring it out. Olivia is eating well and gaining weight- but I know I don’t have it all down pat just yet. I need my Brest friend pillow, and my lanolin cream and a whole slew of other props and cannot at all envision myself being able to go out in public and have to nurse her. Hopefully soon I can wrap my head around it.

3. Your body is in a strange place. I gained a decent amount of weight while pregnant. Okay fine, I gained 40 pounds. Okay, I gained 45. I want to admit that because I’m tired of reading blogs where women only gain 20 pounds and are still freaking about it. I gained 45 pounds. Since coming home from the hospital I lost 23. But I’m still in maternity clothes, I still have a lot to lose, and my body is so….smushy, and wide. I’m not worried about losing the weight right now- but I do plan to join weight watchers when I get the okay from my doctor.

(3 weeks post partum)

4. Life as I know it has changed. And there have been times where I feel like it is over. Sometimes when it’s 3am and I’m alone feeding Olivia in the nursery I stare out the window and wonder if I’ll ever sleep again. And then I get a grip. But trust me, when you’re inside the house for weeks at a time and are a slave to 3 hour feeding windows and 1 hour napping windows, it just doesn’t feel normal. The other day I had finally set Olivia down for a nap and just barely finished making eggs before she cried. I tried to eat some of the egg, got yolk all over myself and burned my throat so badly because I tried to eat the egg before it cooled so I could get to the basinet in time to rescue the baby. It still hurts to swallow.

5. I watch more TV, but appointment television is OVER. I almost cried tears of joy when Joe and I got to watch Modern Family the other night.

 

6. I cry a lot. Happy tears, sad tears, scared tears, hormonal tears…you will cry.

 

7. And I sweat a lot. I have major night sweats (normal after birth as your body rids of extra fluids).

 

8. I’m terrified of my breast pump.

 

9. I’ll never view mothers in the same way again. I cannot believe how hard this is. And now I look at every mom I know that has been through it, and I am so impressed and in awe.

10. I don’t think I’ll ever see my husband the same way again. Seeing Joe as a father is the most incredible thing. I just can’t get enough of the way he rocks her, swaddles her, calms her, and calms me when I am a complete sweaty basket case that thinks I’m not good enough at this, or capable of doing it alone when he is gone.

The love overwhelms it all, and ultimately I am so happy- but I wanted you to know that it’s not all rainbows and butterflies, and it’s not all natural. You will need help, and advice, and you will be scared. But it’s all worth it, and I’m hoping that with each day it gets easier for me.

 

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Olivia’s Birth Story – Part 2

After six or seven frantic calls, Joe finally picked up his phone. I told him that he needed to come back ASAP, it was time to push. Neither of us could believe that it was already time. I could tell from the sound of his voice that he was starting to run. I called the parents to update them and before I knew it Joe was back and things were moving quickly.

 

Even though I had two epidurals, the doctor did such a wonderful job that I could still feel the pressure of the contractions and move my legs. With each contraction I pushed about 3 or 4 times. It was exhausting, but I was so determined. My doctor and the nurses and Joe encouraged me and I tried with all of my might to push. I knew I was so close.

 

After about 30 minutes the doctor told me this was my last push. I couldn’t believe she was already so close to being in my arms.

 

And with that last and final push came the most beautiful sight I had ever seen. My healthy baby girl. The doctor placed her on my chest and Joe and I just looked at each other with all the emotion in the world in our eyes. I know everyone says this, but the love is indescribable. Your heart just grows. I’ve never felt anything like it.

After some time with her, the doctor cleaned her up and I was able to attempt to nurse (no idea what I was doing), but I tried to do what they taught me in my class. After some more family time, our parents were allowed in. They all watched Olivia’s bath and took turns holding her. It was so nice to sit back and watch her.

I always thought that I might miss being pregnant a little bit. That I’d miss the kicks and the big belly and the extra attention. I couldn’t have been more wrong. As I looked into my daughter’s eyes, and I looked at my husband, now a father, I have never felt more complete.

Welcome to the world Olivia Josephine. You are loved more than you will ever know.

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Olivia’s Birth Story- Part 1

Wow, my laptop is awfully dusty. I’ve looked at it since being home, but thinking about actually writing up a post seemed like a gigantic feat. Since being home things have been overwhelming in a whole new way. My life is lived in 3 hour stretches between feedings, and my goals during those 3 hours are usually to eat something, rest, and go to the bathroom. Fortunately I’ve had an incredible amount of help from my mom who is here this week, and Joe has been home as well. We tag team most things- but he is my rock when it comes to doing the hard and scary stuff like changing messy diapers, swaddling, and rocking her to sleep when she won’t stop wailing. I feel terrible when she cries but he encourages me to get through it.

Now, before I forget everything (because things are already getting hazy), here is Olivia’s birth story.

 

On Superbowl Sunday, the eve of my induction, Joe and I headed to the hospital at 3:30pm and I was admitted to triage for a cervical gel treatment. The gel was supposed to help soften my cervix to prepare me for the induction the following day. Both the doctor and nurse told me that the gel is not enough to put me into labor, but that it would get things going. (hopefully).

Prior to receiving the gel, the nurse checked me and noted that I was still not even slightly dilated. She then applied the gel, hooked me up to monitors to check for contractions and watch the baby’s heartbeat, and Joe and I relaxed for about an hour and a half until they sent us home.

 

On the way home we picked up some sandwiches and wings and went home to watch the game and visit with Joe’s parents who were already in town from Pittsburgh. At around 11, I headed up to bed. For the last time, I dragged my slow, 41 week pregnant self upstairs, and crawled into bed with my snoogle pillow (best pregnancy investment ever). I couldn’t believe tomorrow I was going to meet my baby.

At 3am I awoke out of a sound sleep with some cramping. Considering the greasy dinner we had, and the fact that I had to run to the bathroom, I figured these were stomach cramps, not labor related. I had gotten excited too many times about these kind of cramps only to have them disappear after a few trips to the bathroom. 

 

Around 3:30, the cramps were getting really bad, so I woke up Joe. I debated whether to call the doctor just yet, considering that I could not get off the toilet. My body kept sending me mixed signals (labor?) (stomach ache?) and I was confused. I started tracking the cramps and noticed they were coming about 2 minutes apart. The pattern convinced me it was time to call, and I was scared at how close the cramps (or contractions) were coming. I though that they started far apart and got closer and closer? Where was my break in between?

 

The doctor told me that if I could, I should wait 1 hour or until I couldn’t walk or talk through the pain. I said okay, hung up the phone and had a contraction that I could definitely not talk through. I had to hold on to the wall to help bear down on the pain. I yelled to Joe (who was downstairs making me something to eat before we headed to the hospital) that we had to go, NOW. Joe packed the car and we were off. I grabbed onto the handle on the car ceiling for dear life as I tried to breathe through the pain.  I kept my eyes closed almost the whole time we were on our way. The pain was excruciating and I felt like the contractions were so close that I never had a chance to recover. Finally I opened my eyes and saw the hospital approaching.

 

Soon after arriving at the emergency room I was taken to the delivery floor. I got checked in and a resident came in to check my progress. As she began the pelvic exam, my water broke. (The look on her face was classic..she was obviously new at this). Even with my broken water though, the nurse confirmed that I was only 2cm dilated. At this point the she asked if I wanted an epidural and I was so relieved that they could give it to me at this point. I watched the door like a hawk waiting for the anesthesiologist to come in.

 

What felt like an eternity was about 30 minutes, but eventually the epidural was administered. It felt great at first, but then I noticed that only my right side was numb. I was still feeling the contractions on my left side, and since they had me laying on my left hip, I thought I was going to die. The nurse upped the medicine, and a new anesthesiologist came in to see if he could fix the drip. They tried a few things but nothing worked, so the doctor had to re-do the epidural. Fifteen minutes later…

 

Finally. Relief.

 

I watched the sun come up through the blinds and watched the panic slowly melt off of Joe’s face as I relaxed. The nurse turned down the lights and told me that now I could rest and that the doctor would check me in a little bit. Joe decided now would be a good time to go get our bags from the car and call our parents with an update.

 

About 5 minutes after Joe left, the doctor came to check me. At this point we had been at the hospital for about 4 hours or so. A few seconds into the pelvic exam my doctor looked at the nurse and the nurse said, "she’s ready, isn’t she?" and the doctor nodded yes.

It was time to push.

 

I frantically got my phone and called Joe. I called and called and called, but each call went to voicemail….

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Still Here…

Hi guys!

Just wanted to let you know that I’m still here, and still pregnant! Today marks 40 weeks and 3 days.

Last night I went to my last doctors appointment where I was told that I still have not progressed.

(TMI ALERT)

Although my cervix is softening, there is no dilation and the cervix is still closed. The doctor believes that at this point I will surely need to be induced, so that’s what I’m expecting at this point.

Basically, unless I surprisingly go into labor on my own beforehand, I’ll be induced on Monday at some point. Better party it up this weekend!

I’ve been keeping busy at home doing little errands and organizing things. Yesterday I rearranged the pantry and cleaned out the fridge. I’ve also been cooking some good meals for us.  This weekend I even made my first ever loaf of bread. I used this recipe. SO EASY!!

And man, it was PERFECTION.

 

Today my big errand is going to be some grocery shopping for the week and some cooking. Most likely a little cleaning will find it’s way into there as well. This is of course all contingent on whether or not I can remove myself from the couch. I’m currently stuck in a 2006 Real Housewives of OC marathon vortex on Bravo.

 

Have a great day, and I’ll keep you posted here or on Twitter.
Follow me @FoodinRL

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